she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Can I color on your dick again?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
