I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
