I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
