How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Houston, we have a blender
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
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