Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
