used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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