I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
