it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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