i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize
