She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
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