sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
