She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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