i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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