Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize