Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
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