just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Randomize
