Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize