What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
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