Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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