i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
He better not be in your backpack
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
