This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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