Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Randomize
