it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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