He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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