Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize