Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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