Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
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