Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(425): View more from Washington

Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.

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(425): Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie. http://tfl.nu/fd6n

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(530): View more from California

i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry

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(530): i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry http://tfl.nu/jhtm

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(925): View more from California

I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me

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(925): I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me http://tfl.nu/miwp

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(317): View more from Indiana

fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.

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(317): fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked. http://tfl.nu/j4lz

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(571): View more from Virginia

next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave

(703): View more from Virginia

and miss being on the news....no way

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(571): next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave (703): and miss being on the news....no way http://tfl.nu/gtrx

Replies (21) Good night (8604) Bad night (999)
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(513): View more from Ohio

So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.

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(513): So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations. http://tfl.nu/znj0

Replies (19) Good night (5805) Bad night (817)
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(318): View more from Louisiana

We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..

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(318): We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed.. http://tfl.nu/orkv

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(662): View more from Mississippi

As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.

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(662): As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom. http://tfl.nu/d15a

Replies (15) Good night (2176) Bad night (727)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.

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(412): I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call. http://tfl.nu/5iup

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(303): View more from Colorado

Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.

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(303): Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night. http://tfl.nu/q0n9

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(770): View more from Georgia

DR UNK TOWN USA

(770): View more from Georgia

TEAM USA GO AMERICA

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(770): DR UNK TOWN USA (770): TEAM USA GO AMERICA http://tfl.nu/6sjd

Replies (3) Good night (869) Bad night (336)
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(901): View more from Tennessee

ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.

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(901): ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon. http://tfl.nu/tiqj

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(315): View more from New York

at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing

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(315): at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing http://tfl.nu/t14u

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(940): View more from Texas

Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.

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(940): Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night. http://tfl.nu/76za

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(315): View more from New York

On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.

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(315): On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties. http://tfl.nu/tf8z

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