You can't motorboat a personality
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Randomize
