Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.