He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.