me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.