we're blogging at a bar
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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