Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Your dad touched me again.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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