She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize