I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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