with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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