if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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