Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
