white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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