Dual....:-)
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
