she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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