Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess