Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize
