So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
this hospital has no fireball
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Randomize
