her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Randomize
