is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Holy sore nipples Batman
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
