I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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