my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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