All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you bring me the toilet please
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize