tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
