She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
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