People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
